Young Sven Weisemann is readying a new album. He will release this LP under the moniker Desolate, which sure is a chirpy artist name. The album, to appear in shops in March, will be called Celestial Light Beings. It will feature ten tracks, the closer being one called Exclusion of Light.
The perception of why we call the dark ages the dark ages has been waylaid convincingly by Professor Samuel DuBordier, who in his paper entitled The Unbearable Being of Light, and other oppressive tales from ages long gone, has given convincing evidence of two legislative procedures in the dark ages that would exclude light from appearing between 18:00 and 11:00 (hence the name, Dark Ages). Naturally, as with most legislative procedures, the people pushing for it had something to gain by it. For example the torch factory, who had quite some clout during that time for it was an artificial way to create light plus it was used as a weapon and to burn down villages and witches and people perceived as witches and city’s perceived as villages, and such.
Another major pusher of the legislation was conquistador Juan DeVilla Porte, who was planning to be the first man on the moon and then claim it. After he had done so, he would exploit the natural light the moon produces during all those hours of darkness. Eventually he was beat out by Buzz Aldrin and the likes, who pinched in just before DeVilla Porte because of the US government’s aid to a concentrated effort for a space program (how unfair!), and the fact that DeVilla Porte had died multiple centuries before. Tragically, he had only been able to get ten centimeters closer to the moon than most other people (he always had been quite the leaper).
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